Sunday Nights And Single

If you are single, what is it about Sunday night that can make you feel lonely and depressed? Besides wanting a relationship, what else is giving you the blues? Is it the guilt that you feel from all the weekend tasks that went from good intentions to no attention?

Being single on a Sunday night can bring an affliction I call The Sunday Night Miseries. These miseries, like taco sauce, come in three levels of intensity: mild, medium, and hot. What does that look like?

Mild

Sunday night and single with the Mild miseries are when you had planned to clean up your house and make your living space attractive so that when you did meet someone, you could invite them over to the home you are proud of. However, on Sunday night, you are staring at the load of laundry, or stacks of mail and papers, or piled up back porch that you had meant to clean but did not. You wouldn't want anyone to see the mess you live in. In the meantime, the clutter makes you feel tired when you look at it.

What can you do about it? Organize clutter by taking one shelf, drawer, or closet at a time. If you look at the entire house that needs attention, you may never get around to it because it is overwhelming. But cleaning up litter is guaranteed to bring you a sense of more control over your life, which brings you more confidence, which makes you more attractive.

Medium

Sunday night and single with theMedium miseries are the people you remember but don't see anymore because your relationship ended from something you said or did or they said or did. Whatever the emotional baggage is from the past, it feels heaviest on Sunday night.

What can you do? Make amends wherever you can. Call and apologize, or forgive them, or forgive yourself, and let it go. Talk it through with a counselor if you need to. Baggage is not just past relationships that did not turn out well, but can also be caused by feeling you are unappreciated and taken advantage of. If you have this persistent misery, you may not be taking responsibility for where you are in your life and how you are letting people treat you.

Hot

Depressed and lonely with the Hot miseries are the extra weight you have gained, the stress from a job you aren't sure you want to do anymore, and the loneliness you feel from not having a mate. You need a vacation but your budget is too tight and you don't have time anyway.

What can you do? Find a buddy to work out with. Hire a Life Coach or Career Coach to help you find the work you are meant to do. Call friends and make plans to get out socially and put it on your calendar.

The miseries don't have to dominate your Sunday nights. Tell yourself this: I can't do everything at once, but I can do one thing at a time. After each accomplishment, I am going to celebrate myself in some way.

One step at a time, with encouragement from a kinder, inner voice, you deserve to arrive at this place: Sunday night, single, and sensational.

For more tips, skills, and insight on dating, relationships, singles, and love. Subscribe to our Free Savvy Dating Newsletter from master single's coach, life coach, and syndicated columnist, Tonja Weimer.